


Shook.

by Rmepashn



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst and Humor, Deaf Character, F/F, Falling In Love, Grief/Mourning, Lesbian Sex, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, References to Depression, Sexual Content, Slow Burn, Unrequited Love, World Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-02
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2019-03-12 19:55:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13554459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rmepashn/pseuds/Rmepashn
Summary: This is not a traditional love story. Lexa isn't sure it's a love story at all. She just knows that she's forever changed. She isn't sure if it was love because, then wouldn't she get the girl?  But she's not sure what else it could be. She just knows she's shook.××××Lexa doesn't know much but she does know that finding a way to say goodbye to Clarke has never been possible.A/N: no idea if I'll continue this. Let's see how it does!HAPPY READING





	Shook.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: this is something I've been mulling over for a long time and I want to give it a shot. It's not intended to be a fluffy love story. I intend to make this as real as possible. 
> 
> Also, just because I could I made both Lexa and Clarke partially deaf.
> 
> The underage and noncon tags refer to possible references to past abuse. It will not be detailed.  
>  
> 
> Comments are always welcome, I hope you enjoy!

This is not a love story.

To call it a love story isn't really fair. The way they came together, it changed them both completely. It was looking back, the stuff of legends. 

People say that soul mates are the person your meant to be with. 

But what if, sometimes...it's the person that comes along and changes your life without you noticing.

××××××

Lexa wasn't anything special, at least in her own eyes. And that of her family. As the oldest of three Lexa had grown up bearing the weight of her father's anger. 

As a toddler Lexa had had a younger brother, Aden.

He been her best friend, family still commented on how shed mothered him.

However, he had been born sickly and he had passed away suddenly just before Lexas third birthday. 

Her parents, young themselves were distraught. Discharging early from the Marines her father took the remains of there little family home. 

To Tacoma Washington.

Then just as abruptly he left. 

Abandoning Lexa and her Mother who after his departure discovered she was pregnant with Lexas younger brother Lincoln.

Lexa bounces between her parents for over a year as her Father, Titus seemingly finds a new family with a woman named Natalie who has a healthy son. 

After Lincoln is born Titus begs to come back and Lexa is confused when with no explanation her father has returned and she is forbidden to ask about his departure or return. 

He's different though, he's angry. All the time, Lexa can do nothing correctly. This eventually dissolves into Titus beating Lexa for her mistakes. Her mother allows it, it's Lexa who is in the wrong. 

Lincoln is doted on by their parents. As the child that didn't ask about Aden and the child that didn't shrink away from their Father he thrives. Unfortunately as they are children, Lexa hates her perfect brother. 

Lexa doesn't ever understand how Lincoln live's while her other brother went away.

She's quick to temper and lashes out at her younger brother. She loves him and is terrified that he will go away like Aden and doesn't believe the grown ups that try to assuage her fears. 

She grows up quiet, learning early to avoid interacting with her family.

Eventually her Mother gives birth again to a sister this time. Anya who quickly steals everyone's hearts. Her baby sisters natural humor and wit makes her a spoiled happy child. 

Lexa loves to read, she's a familiar face at the local libraries where she spends hours absorbed in worlds beyond her reach. 

The librarians and teachers all laugh and smile at the shy little girl with curly brown hair that reads from open to close every weekend. 

Lexa however fails miserably in school. 

Lexa had been born with a minor hearing disability called Unilateral Microtia meaning her left ear didn't form properly in utero and as a result she was partially deaf and struggled with hearing and speech.

A minor speech impediment makes her nervous to speak and her peers are relentless. 

Her family is also not wealthy at all so she is teased for her work sneakers and faded t-shirts that are always to big. 

Her teachers claim it's a learning disability because she excells at IQ tests. Her parents are furious. Her failing grades embarrass them and they accuse her of laziness. 

Lexa simply buries herself deeper in her books. The stories about far off places, cultures long dead, history. All of it fascinates her as she plans her escape from her family. 

She's ten years old when she decides she will never need anyone. 

××××××××××

2006

Lexa shifts nervously as she turns down another empty hallway to the strange high school. 

Lexa finally finds the room she was instructed to look for. 

The Art class, Lexa brushes a hand through her riotous hair. It would be five years before she discovers the wonders of hair creme.

Her fingers briefly trace the small braids she had let Anya put in her hair that morning.

At eighteen Lexa was taller than most of her class, she also was the only one among her friends with multiple tattoos. 

This and her stereotypical love of flannel, leather jacket and untamed curls served her well among her friends. There was rarely a shortage of girls to flirt with however for all her faux arrogance Lexa was painfully shy when it came to sex.

Lexa had made a name for herself her sophomore year when she came out.

She had been surprised when there had been no negative reaction from her peers.

No, the negative unsurprisingly came from home.

Her father had reenlisted into the Army she had been fourteen. 

Her Mother had quite obviously been sick however their civilian insurance didn't cover the testing her Mother needed. 

So her Father had reenlisted and as soon as his training had been done her Mother had been rushed into the ER to discover she had a large, thankfully non cancerous brain tumor.

It had taken nearly a year for her Motherto recover from the lengthy operation that'd followed. 

Lexa had been pulled out of school during her father's training to care for her siblings and look after her Mother. 

Upon returning to school Lexa was shocked to suddenly find school easy. She excelled in all of her classes. Except for math, because fuck math. 

After a lifetime of neglect and aggression from her parents Lexa is thrown into an almost panic at the sudden approval she receives from them over her grades. 

That is of course, until she comes out.

Her strict military father and conservative mother hadn't been pleased when she had come out.

They had ranted and raved, pleaded and threatened. There had been a few visits to therapists and the church pastors. 

Older relatives suddenly wanted to have serious discussions about life and family.

No one bothered to ask Lexa what shed wanted though. 

Lexa had found herself fighting for the smallest freedom until finally she had determined to found her schools first GSA and she was at a neighboring school to get the details.

This was 2006 afterall and any day now she was sure someone was going too assassinate Bush.

Lexa had decided early in her newfound academic success that she wanted to go to UC Berkeley and become a zoologist. 

Lexa poured her efforts into this and told no one. She packed her daily schedule with as many activities as she could. The goal being, to appeal to Universities and avoid her family. 

Lexa straightened her bag as she stepped in to the classroom. She could hear laughing and talking as she took in the large room.

Floor to ceiling it was covered in artwork, the long tables central to the room was surrounded by kids. 

She's surprised at their number, shed struggled to get ten kids to her own unofficial GSA meetings.

She smiles as they all turn to look at her. She's suddenly so nervous she feels like she's sweating. 

"Hi, I'm sorry to bother but I'm from the other school and I'm hoping to sit in on your meeting and see how you guys operate?" 

"Yes, of course come in. I'm Mr Kane and this is our GSA. You are?"

"Lexa, I'm Lexa." She is surprised she didn't stammer as she manages to sit without embarrassing herself. 

Lexa smiled nervously at the new faces staring at her. 

There's an obvious relaxed feeling she enjoys and then she turns to her left and her eyes stop. 

There's a girl sitting at the far end cuddled up to a petite Latina girl wearing a Einstein t-shirt.

She's blonde wearing a strange pioneer costume complete with a blue bonnet which when Lexa stares makes the blonde blush bright pink. 

"I'm Lexa."She hears herself say, her attention suddenly entirely owned by beautiful blue eyes. 

"I'm Clarke." Clarke says, Lexa freezes. She can hear it in the blondes voice. She is deaf or hard of hearing just like Lexa. 

Lexa smiled. She's never met another lgbqt person who was like her.

"I like your bonnet." Lexa says, smirking slightly. Really? She mocks herself internally.

"Thanks. This is Raven, my girlfriend." Clarke says and a couple of the kids next to her smile. 

TBC


End file.
